Compl---

This is why blogs are fucked up. Sometimes something occurs in your life, and you want to tell people about it, but you want to keep it to yourself. But you want to write it down to remember how you felt, yet you'll never read it again.

Today I met up with my ex. She emailed me a couple weeks ago and said she was moving away, and wanted to give me a couple things back. I was jealous she was leaving town, then I started wondering, why is she leaving, where is she going, etc etc.

She's moving to be with a guy. She met him on Match.com. I'm happy for her, and hope that she's happy and taken care of. It's been about a year since I last spoke with her, and she seems to have matured a good bit.

We met up around 6:30 and let the animals play. Mine will attack others, but not hers, he loves hers more than anything he loves to play with them, it always makes me so happy when he plays with them. I swear the hardest part was saying goodbye to her animals tonight, they were a big part of my life.

Part of me misses her, but a bigger part of me knows that it wouldn't work out, heak, it didn't. Maybe I just want that warm feeling, when you are naive and don't care, when you feel safe and comfortable, you clicked, you're with the person you're going to spend the rest of your life with. Right now, the girl I'm seeing, she makes me feel really good, she's a great girl, I just maybe feel like there's a spark missing ... I'm not even sure why, she really IS special. Why can't I find a person I click with so completely that I am blind to everything else in the world.

I don't miss my ex, I miss that feeling of completeness that I had, that is what I miss. I hope I haven't lost that completely, I hope to know that feeling again some day.