OLIVE being single
This weekend was great. My roommate's trailer-trash-like sister was here for the weekend. That was interesting, but she really was kinda cool, except for moments of sibling screaming matches.
Anyways ... I went into a home in a neighborhood near me, a neighborhood I wanted a home in SOOO bad a couple years ago. Man what a dump! Everything was going to cost extra. They have linoleum in the kitchen ... it's just tacky for the way the homes look on the outside. Oh, not to mention they bought these places like 2 yrs ago for 135-150 and can't sell for much more than 5k+ now. Phew!
I went for 2 long as hell bike rides. It was great, my body is reminding me that I hadn't been in a long while.
Friday I was pestering the local bike shop, and they informed me that the road bike I've wanted so desperately is IN TRANSIT!!!! Looks like I need to find $2500 F-A-S-T! Ok, so I'm lying ... I horde my money pretty good, so I'll just have to kiss it goodbye! I'm so excited about the bike though ... I can't wait.
Moving along ... today after my 2:45:00 ride ... I went to a local chinese buffet, alone. It wasn't as bad as I thought. I was in such deep thought, sitting there, stuffing my face alone, that it really didn't bother me, and I don't think people were looking at me funny anyways. I ate until I wanted to throw up, and then I left :) ... it was eerily cool. I thought about eating better, but it was a "carb reload" meal (justified, HA!) ... and basically the last 45 minutes of my bike ride, all I thought about was which buffet in town to go to.
Hmmm what else. My room is a mess. I need to start folding laundry and arranging my shit. I think this week I'm going to have to start cutting back how much time I play counter-strike so I can get things done. I made this revelation this morning at 4:45am as I crawled into bed after a night of CS. Hell, I have to get up for work in a few hours, how do you think I got here? CS, that's right.
The ex hasn't written shit in her journal in over a week, and this bothers me. Not because I'm worried that she off'd herself ... but because it was entertaining reading that shit. Oh well. I still miss the sex, that shit was great. I should have tried to nail my roommate's sister, or one of the drunk bitches at the bar.
Oh, speaking of the bar, that reminds me. There was karaoke. I was sober of course, as usual, and this FAT-OLD-UGLY AS FUCK lady wearing a red sweatsuit, but not the thick kind, the skinny spandexy like ... is doing karaoke, and comes up to me, and starts rubbing her FAT MIDRETH pouch on me, like humping me and touching me ... I wanted to die. As she approached, I thought the mic line would run out and she'd stop short, but noooo, she made it. I was mortified. After that I got up and moved further back so she couldn't come back.
Meanwhile, a couple drunk college guys go up and double team her, I wanted to end my life right there. It was gross. The best part was when she got this other dude, a few tables over, I noticed them laughing as I was getting fat-humped ... so I took the opportunity to point, laugh, and yell ... "NOT AS FUNNY AS WHEN SHE WAS HUMPING ME, EH!?" ...
Man I'm tired. I should go get the animal and go to bed.
-Dude
Anyways ... I went into a home in a neighborhood near me, a neighborhood I wanted a home in SOOO bad a couple years ago. Man what a dump! Everything was going to cost extra. They have linoleum in the kitchen ... it's just tacky for the way the homes look on the outside. Oh, not to mention they bought these places like 2 yrs ago for 135-150 and can't sell for much more than 5k+ now. Phew!
I went for 2 long as hell bike rides. It was great, my body is reminding me that I hadn't been in a long while.
Friday I was pestering the local bike shop, and they informed me that the road bike I've wanted so desperately is IN TRANSIT!!!! Looks like I need to find $2500 F-A-S-T! Ok, so I'm lying ... I horde my money pretty good, so I'll just have to kiss it goodbye! I'm so excited about the bike though ... I can't wait.
Moving along ... today after my 2:45:00 ride ... I went to a local chinese buffet, alone. It wasn't as bad as I thought. I was in such deep thought, sitting there, stuffing my face alone, that it really didn't bother me, and I don't think people were looking at me funny anyways. I ate until I wanted to throw up, and then I left :) ... it was eerily cool. I thought about eating better, but it was a "carb reload" meal (justified, HA!) ... and basically the last 45 minutes of my bike ride, all I thought about was which buffet in town to go to.
Hmmm what else. My room is a mess. I need to start folding laundry and arranging my shit. I think this week I'm going to have to start cutting back how much time I play counter-strike so I can get things done. I made this revelation this morning at 4:45am as I crawled into bed after a night of CS. Hell, I have to get up for work in a few hours, how do you think I got here? CS, that's right.
The ex hasn't written shit in her journal in over a week, and this bothers me. Not because I'm worried that she off'd herself ... but because it was entertaining reading that shit. Oh well. I still miss the sex, that shit was great. I should have tried to nail my roommate's sister, or one of the drunk bitches at the bar.
Oh, speaking of the bar, that reminds me. There was karaoke. I was sober of course, as usual, and this FAT-OLD-UGLY AS FUCK lady wearing a red sweatsuit, but not the thick kind, the skinny spandexy like ... is doing karaoke, and comes up to me, and starts rubbing her FAT MIDRETH pouch on me, like humping me and touching me ... I wanted to die. As she approached, I thought the mic line would run out and she'd stop short, but noooo, she made it. I was mortified. After that I got up and moved further back so she couldn't come back.
Meanwhile, a couple drunk college guys go up and double team her, I wanted to end my life right there. It was gross. The best part was when she got this other dude, a few tables over, I noticed them laughing as I was getting fat-humped ... so I took the opportunity to point, laugh, and yell ... "NOT AS FUNNY AS WHEN SHE WAS HUMPING ME, EH!?" ...
Man I'm tired. I should go get the animal and go to bed.
-Dude
posted by Epic Dude at
1:33 AM
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