That's Craptastic

Recently I've been having stomach pains. I get an upset stomach that will last for anywhere from 30 seconds to 10 minutes, and then it just vanishes, without unloading. But, when it first started, I basically would go and unload constantly. It's not fun feelin' like this!

What if I'm in public and it's not a false alarm, but I hope it goes away, and then I shit my pants!?

buddy: so it's a controllable diarhea?
dude: I think so
buddy: so 3 minutes ago you could have just shit your brains out?
buddy: but you held it in?
dude: YES
dude: and now I feel fine
buddy: and ever 20 minutes or so you feel like you REALLY have to go
dude: YES
dude: I have IBS?
buddy: You have a semen infection in your rectum.
dude: :|
buddy: ha
dude: that was a good one